Tag Archives: leadership

Why leading Christians is Painful

I just began reading a new book entitled “The Painful Side of Leadership.” I’m only just beginning, but I am thoroughly enjoying this highly recommended piece of writing. It is proving to be so helpful.

The book is written by Jeff Iorg, the President of Golden Gate Baptist Theological Seminary in San Francisco, California. He ha served as a senior leader in multiple capacities including the seminary, local churches and other organization. And his words are proving to be very helpful to me. I suggest that any reader, especially in Christian organizations, give it a read.

Young leaders tend to romanticize leadership. In our minds, everyone wants to be helpful, organizations work well as long as they are led with passion and God always wins every battle. But in the long run, in the process of leadership, we begin to experience things that bring all of those expectations into question.

People get mad at us for doing what we thought was right and good. We hurt feelings unintentionally and cause others pain. Our mistakes slow down the church’s (or whatever organization we are leading’s) progress. We lose friends. We make new friends. Then sometimes we lose those friends as well.

Our reputations become ‘diverse.’ Some love us. Others don’t. And many times, young adults who are very used to impressing and being loved become unimpressive and hated.

Leading Christians can be different that we expect. And as I have learned over time, it can and will break you to your very core.

But that is where God steps in and builds you back up. And honestly, I’m beginning to see that it is one of the many ways that God builds us into the people we are created to be.

Here are some thoughts from the book on why leading Christians is painful.

1. Christians make sinful choices.
2. Leaders make sinful choices.
3. Sin infects everything.
4. Satan is on the prowl.

A. Satan is often behind ‘stealthy’ opposition.
B. Satan may be involved when the opposition is manipulative.
C. Satan may be involved when the opposition is secretive or ‘clandestine.’
D. Satan is also behind resolutely uncooperative opposition.

5. God allows painful circumstances that may not be anyone’s fault.
6. Leading change (which Christian leaders must do) can be painful.

In the long run we must remember a few things. And these are my words and not necessarily Dr. Iorg’s.

1. Our battle is not with people. We are to love people and treat them with respect, kindness, honestly and love… even when we think they are being jerks, or difficult or oppositional.

2. Our battle is with Satan. He is a liar, carries great influence in a world of people who are slaves to sin and desires our total and complete demise. Christian leaders are a hated people in the ‘spirit’ world. Satan literally hates us. And we should not be shocked at his attacks.

3. Jesus is faithful. He promised it again and again. And when we are under attack, the first thing that is tested is our willingness to trust Christ at His Word. He will not leave us. He will not forsake us. We are never alone in His work… even if it seems that we are totally alone. Jesus is faithful.

4. The battle is worth fighting. Some prefer not to use battle metaphors for Christian living. But the more I am around the church and ministering in the world, the more of a battle I believe that it is. And it is a battle that Christ wins. I want to be on His team. I want to be doing His work. I want to be true to the calling He has on my life. And I want to keep going.

Jesus has sent the church on a mission. And it is a hard mission. It is a dangerous mission. It is a mission that will bring about spiritual and relational casualties. We have an enemy who wants to destroy us. But we have a God who will sustain us.

So lets keep going.

Sword (Bible) in our hand. Love in our Heart. Heaven in our sights.


We just aren’t enough…

One of the most challenging things about leadership in the developing American church is administrating and negotiating the struggles of diversity.

You see, if everyone thinks-acts-believes the same things about all things… it’s pretty easy to lead.

But that never really happens does it.

In a diverse church (Like Four Rivers), where people think-act-believe in different ways at different times, we have to deal with the differences.

We have to welcome the same diversities that will be evident in heaven…

Now, I’m not really talking about heresy. Heresy is a bad teaching that is so bad that it takes away from or ‘lies’ about the core Christian truths that we hold dear.

I’m talking about those other (open handed) issues where Christians have freedom to follow their own understanding of Scriptural teachings.

In these areas, I am learning that some choose unity in the diversity. And others simply want everyone to do it – see it – live it their way—all the time.

And for those folks, leaders like me who lovingly try to lead in diversity will never be enough.

So to all those leaders who aren’t:

Conservative enough for the fundamentalists…

Liberal enough for the Liberals…

White enough for the whites only folks.

Black enough for the black only folks.

Manifestation enough for the wild charismatics…

Spiritually inactive enough for the ceasationists…

Rock N Roll enough for the young only folks

Traditional enough for the old school only folks.

Denominational enough for the (insert denom name) only folks.

Loud enough for those who like yelling.

Quiet enough for those who love reverence.

Prosperity enough for those who want more ‘blessing’ from God.

Etc.

I think you stand in a good place.

Just make sure that no matter what… You are gospel enough for a God of grace & mercy. Make sure you are cross & resurrection enough for the Messiah.

And that is ultimately about understanding that Christ is ENOUGH for His Church.

Lead well… You stand in a good place.

It is sometimes lonely. It is sometimes frustrating. You may want to lose heart.

Don’t.

Keep focusing on the gospel of Christ.

Keep standing in His Grace.


Lessons learned from Freddie Couples leading the Masters Golf Tourney

Most people don’t realize how much I love golf. I don’t tend to talk about golf a lot, but I have played avidly and been in love with the sport since I was a young child. (Thanks to my dad who took me golfing nearly every day of the summer when I was a kid.)

The Masters tournament is going on this week. For those who do not know, this is the biggest tournament in golf.

Anyway, 20 years ago, a 32 year old man named Freddie Couples was my favorite pro golfer. I was a senior in high school, played high school golf for Livingston Central, and loved the Masters.

And he won that year. He put on the prestigious green jacket and was the envy of young men like myself who love the game.

I was and have always been a Freddie Couples fan. He is truly a great personality and great player.

And today, at 52… He is leading the Masters once again.

To the point..

I tend to think younger than I should. At 38 I sometimes feel beyond my prime as if I’m getting older in a young man’s game… (I know that sounds stupid. But I lead an innovative church. And although I grow spiritually with age… Innovation comes more naturally to the young.)

I hope that like Freddie, I am still honing my skills a putting them to good use in my 50′s.

Go Freddie. You can win this thing!


Being a Disappointment

Without a doubt, one of the hardest parts of leading the church is experiencing the pain of knowing that your choices have disappointed, frustrated, angered or hurt someone at a very deep, spiritual level.

This happens in various ways.

1. I have seen people hurt through decisions that were right.

2. I have seen people hurt through decisions that were wrong.

3. I have seen people hurt through decisions that I still can’t define as right or wrong.

The honest reality is that if you lead change, you will impact people in a painful way. And that is a very difficult reality.

I know this is not unique to church leadership. If you have ever been married, been someone’s boss or raised a child, you have experienced this pain.

You can’t have it both ways. You will either change nothing or hurt someone. And that may be the toughest part of the job.

There is no good way to lead without this tension.

And don’t expect for it to get easier on you. It will always hurt you to hurt someone else. Or at least it should.

In fact, if the pain you feel for others in this way ever goes away in you… you have a spiritual problem.

You should want it to hurt, enough to remind you of the ramifications of your decisions. That way you always take leadership seriously.

It should never be easy for you to make a decision that hurts others.

But you should never stop being willing to make tough decisions when necessary. This is the call of the leader…

And the church cannot thrive without leaders who will lead forward. So lead forward knowing that God brings everything into clarity in the end.

Be intimidated. Realize that you may hurt people. Depend on Christ and other leaders around you. Be humble. Realize that some of your decisions will be wrong. Apologize when you realize you’ve made a mistake.

Keep your confidence in Christ. Keep moving forward.

Don’t let criticism take you down too far.

Know that you are in Christ’s hands.

Lead forward.


The Leadership / Management Conversation

Do you know the difference between leadership and management?

Well, let me preface this with the realization that what I’m about to write are my interpretations and uses of the two concepts. I hope this is helpful.

Leadership isn’t management. But Leadership requires management in most cases.

Leaders are typically more concerned with intangible things… ie., emotions, motives, intimidating factors, big picture, emotional challenges & setbacks, the feeling of success, devotion, teamwork based relationships, crisis moments and motivational focus. Leaders are typically focused on the ‘why’ of accomplishments.

Managers are typically interested in the facts… ie., details, mission statements, organizational structure, strategy plans, budgets and bottom lines. They are also usually more focused on the ‘how’s’ of accomplishment…

Any group of people with a common goal need leaders and managers. One without the other tend to fail long term.

But…

In the short term…

Leaders can motivate people to accomplish a lot in short spurts… Good leaders tend to lead from one short spurt to another.

Managers help them accomplish big spurts of progress when they begin to strategically tie many short spurts together for one greater goal.

But management without leadership usually becomes stagnation.

Leadership without management usually has very little long term effectiveness.

We must find ways to work together…

Thoughts?


Great Leadership Quotes from Tom Landry

“When you want to win a game, you have to teach. When you lose a game, you have to learn.”

“Leadership is a matter of having people look at you and gain confidence, seeing how you react. If you’re in control, they’re in control.”

“Leadership is getting someone to do what they don’t want to do, to achieve what they want to achieve.”

Tom Landry
Former Dallas Cowboys Head Coach


Preparing for Sunday: Why is it that sometimes church feels like an MMA bout?

I’ve spent the second half of the day in the woods, studying and finalizing my thoughts for this Sunday’s sermon… Dirty Feet People 2.

I’m teaching from Acts 6:1-7 which accounts what most would call the first introduction to the ‘deacon’ in the New Testement. And as I’m reading I am reminded… ‘This all started with a big fight.’

Why do churches fight? And why are people so opinionated about things related to their church? I mean… in this passage, the church had just begun & was growing like crazy and what do they start doing… Fussing. Over food…

“She got more than I did…”

Oh, this is really going to help us. I’ve needed to understand this for a long, long time…

When conflict that comes from growth is handled with wisdom… it causes more growth which brings more conflict requiring more wisdom…

Get it?


What about Speaking in Tongues, Prophesy, Gifts of Healing…

Hey everyone,

This Sunday I will be teaching the third week of THE GHOST where we are looking at the role of the Holy Spirit in the life of the church.  This week we will be dealing with what is known as ‘Spiritual Gifts.’

I would love for you to be there.

So what gifts do you think you have?  Let me know right here.


So what is it…

I love conference experiences. I mean really love them. Whenever I am at a leadership or church planting conferance, I feel very happy and close to God.

I wonder why.

I think the reason is multi-faceted. Here are some ideas…

1. My dearest friends are here. I meet up with old buddies and new comrades at conferences. This is the only time I see most of these guys outside of Facebook/Twitter updates and phone calls. It’s really great.
2. I’m focused at conferences. While here there are no meetings, no tv shows, no counseling sessions and no conflicts to manage. It’s just me, The Holy Spirit and a few thousand other church planters.

3. I love and respect church planters. Many of these folks make sacriices for the success of the local church that the average Chrisian would never dream or dare. I don’t just like these guys… I really respect them.

I love getting to sit under great preaching. At home I’m always preaching… and it’s not usually great… At Exponential and Catalyst, I get to be fed by the teaching of the best communicators we have to offer. What a blessing.

So where do you go to meet up with Jesus?


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